Inflamed
by Naivette
Summary: A spark can become a flame and change everything. — Jacob/OC, sequel to Ignited, during Breaking Dawn. Rated T.
1. Prologue

Inflamed

. . . . . . . . . .

La Push, Washington was never somewhere I thought I would end up. But after being relocated due to my mother's job, everything turned to hell. Or so I thought. At first, I couldn't grasp the concept of living here; everyone was so different than I was—tan (some of them) and familiar with the way of life here, the rain and the snow, the lack of sunlight, the cold. I did what I could to deal, but it was obvious that I stuck out like a sore thumb. I attracted attention almost too easily with my arrival.

I made friends instantly, and if it weren't for them, I'm sure I wouldn't have made the decisions I had. Settling into La Push wouldn't have happened; I would have begged to move back home to live with my grandparents, Bunny and Pops. Hayley and I wouldn't have become best friends and I wouldn't have finished my sophomore year of high school.

The most monumental moment I would have missed—meeting Jacob Black. If I were to have left La Push, we would never have met. Our relationship would be nonexistent, as would our extraordinary bond. The Quileutes would just be some tribe that lingered in Washington, their legends strictly myths. Large werewolves would be stupid, mythological creatures with no significance, as would their rivals, vampires.

But that wasn't the case. I was aware of it all.

I'm Sarah Caldwell. My mother and I live alone in La Push with a protection order against my father, who's locked up in jail for a year for abusing my mother. My school friends are ignorant of anything supernatural lingering in the shadows. The Quileutes are my second family, even if they are a pack of wolves. The police officer checking in on me has a daughter who dates a vampire.

My own boyfriend…well, he's nowhere in sight, as he has been for the past few weeks.

This is my story, and it's far from a fairytale.

* * *

_A/N: Hello everyone, and welcome to The Ignited Saga: Inflamed! The second chapter of my Twilight series is now underway. It's been a long wait, a tad longer than a year now, but it's finally here! Not all of the story is finished, but I will try posting new chapters every two weeks or so, which means the updates should be consistent. However, for a head's up, I will be working quite a bit throughout this next semester, but I am dedicated to this series. Please do stick around, and enjoy the ride!_

_Reviews are encouraged, as are Alerts/Follows to keep up with updates._

_~Naivette_

_P.S. Happy Holidays!_


	2. The Distance Between Us

Chapter 1: The Distance Between Us

The rain in Port Angeles was relentless. It beat down on every person who walked the streets, pelting them with water that was more annoying than painful. It made it difficult to hang up posters against telephone poles or ask to hang them in restaurants and department stores; the owners would scold you for looking like a rat and begging for a favor.

It was safe to say that I was pissed.

I stormed out of a hotel lobby and marched down the street, placing a flyer under a parked car's windshield wipers. The ink would probably run from the rain, but I would do what I could to make sure the person I cared about was found.

"Sarah, hey!"

I turned, peering past the rain. A young boy—who no longer looked his age—approached me, his dark eyes squinted due to the water falling from the sky. Thankfully he had a raincoat to keep him from getting sick. Even if it was practically impossible for a werewolf like him, I was still worried.

"Seth," I said, tugging on the hood of my jacket again. "Did you take the next block, like I asked you to?"

"Yeah, yeah, I did, but…" He shook his head. "Do you honestly think this is going to work? I mean, Jacob will come back when he wants to be found."

"I'm not giving up." I turned and proceeded further down the street, placing another flyer on the next car.

"Jake's made up his mind!" Seth exclaimed. "There's nothing we can do to bring him back unless he makes that choice."

"You _let_ him go," I practically spat. My eyes pierced the brown opposite me when I turned around, and Seth actually looked startled. "It's been two weeks now. Two weeks. I gave Charlie a break when it came to this kind of stuff. He's just as worried as I am and he's not even part of your family!"

"It was Sam's call, not ours."

"Screw Sam!" I hollered. Seth frowned, his dark eyebrows coming together over his eyes. "I don't care what call he makes. Jacob and I are supposed to be together right now, and he just let him run off! How stupid and careless can he be?"

A dull rumble of thunder echoed overhead, the rain continuing to pour on my small form. Unlike Seth, I could get sick from this; the weather was cold and wet enough for it, even in July. But I couldn't give up. Jacob was gone, and he didn't even grace me with a call to let me know he was okay.

Talk about being careless. Maybe I should have been scolding Jacob rather than Sam on the subject.

"At least I'm out here helping you," Seth told me. "None of the others would do it."

He was right. Embry and Quil, Jacob's best friends from the get-go, weren't even here. They were with Sam back home. Seth had to practically beg to come along with me, not that I had really asked. Once I heard Chief Swan was putting up flyers in all the major cities in the Olympic Peninsula, I jumped onboard. He needed to focus on Forks matters anyway.

Seth and I escaped the rain by entering a small diner at the end of the street. We claimed a booth in the corner, away from any others. As if we could have them hear our conversation; werewolves weren't something to be discussed so casually. But it couldn't be helped, at least with us. I was sitting across from one, after all, and he was attempting to soothe my worries. It wasn't going to work.

"Seth," I said after a moment, shushing him. "You're just as worried as I am, I get it. But what you don't understand is that Jacob is…tied to me in a way he isn't with you. He may have imprinted on me, but I'm the one who's feeling a sense of loss. I can't do this anymore. I can't act like he's fine when I know that he's not." I fingered one of the flyers. "You didn't see his reaction to the wedding invite."

"I heard it, if that says anything." Seth shrugged a little at my expression. "Jake's thoughts were…crazy. Sam was scared like the rest of us, but he was calm enough to evaluate the situation. He trusts Jake, and so do I. He'll be okay."

"It's not that easy, not for me. I'm supposed to be his substitute for gravity, for Christ's sake! And I can't even get a phone call?"

My sight began to blur just then, my eyes stinging with the forming tears. I had been crying for days now, ever since Jacob took off. After talking with Billy briefly upon Jacob running away, I left and searched every corner of La Push that I could. Once I realized Jacob was nowhere to be found, the tears came. They had been ever since.

Seth's warm hands encircled one of mine. "I see where you're coming from. I do, really. It's just…I know what Jake's thinking too. It isn't pretty. Bella hurt him, Sarah, again. He's not going to let it go that easily."

"He already knew they were getting married, didn't he?" I stared at Seth's large hands. "Why was he so surprised? He acted like she broke his heart all over again." I gasped, lifting my gaze to my companion. "He doesn't still…love her, does he?"

"No," Seth answered instantly. He shook his head. "Not like that. She's family, I guess, like a sister. He just doesn't want her giving up her life, is all. The marriage is one step closer to her becoming one of them."

Edward was one of "them"—a vampire. Bella wanted to be like him, to have forever with him. Marriage was the first step, and after that, immortality. That was all I knew, though, since Jacob didn't talk about it much. Every time he did his anger took over; I always had to calm him down if he didn't do it himself. Apparently it got a hold of him this time.

"Have you talked to her?" I was referring to Bella. Once in a while I stopped by Billy's to check up on him, and see if Jacob was home. He told me that Bella called every day, but nothing more than that had come from her.

"No. She doesn't come to La Push anymore, now that Jake's gone."

"Terrific," I mumbled. This was all going so well already, matters just had to get worse. At least I was trying. I had to return the flyers to Charlie anyway, so I could probably catch Bella then if she was around.

It was mid-afternoon by the time Seth and I gave up on Port Angeles, the city too big for us to cover in one day. I drove him back to Sam and Emily's before heading home myself. A part of me hoped to see Jacob somewhere, my eyes darting the expanse of the lot, but he was nowhere in sight.

"Mom?" I shut the front door behind me and kicked off my shoes. Mom came around the corner just as I hung up my jacket. "Have you heard anything?"

"No calls, honey."

Mom's dirty blonde hair was tied up in a messy bun since this was her day off. She had gotten back to work recently. Her recovery from the abuse had been a long and hard road, but Bunny and Pops stayed for a majority of the time. I only had a few days to care for her on my own. Now that she was back at work, she was better. The distraction must have been nice, as was the redecorated bedroom upstairs. The dents in the walls had been too much for her.

She smoothed my hair at my sadness, then wrapping her arms around me. "I'm sure he's okay," she said softly. "He's a grown boy. He can take care of himself."

I knew that. Jacob was stronger than Mom knew, but that didn't excuse this kind of behavior. He ran off without a word. All I had from him was a t-shirt to sleep in every night and the memory of the sorrow in his eyes. It wasn't the best image to fall asleep to at night.

"I just want him to come back," I said into her shoulder. She squeezed me at the declaration, and I clutched her shirt. "Just a phone call. Just one. That's all I need to know he's alright."

The tears fell freely now, and my mother held me close as we stood in the entryway. This summer was supposed to be great; Victoria was gone and no longer hunting Bella down, her newborns were destroyed, and the pack was back to running circuits every night in order to build their stamina. Jacob was supposed to be doing that, running around on all fours with the others, getting stronger. He was supposed to be with me…

He let his feelings for Bella come between us, and that hurt the most.

. . . . . . . . . .

Forks was a small town; bigger than La Push, but still small. Finding the Chief of Police's home wasn't too hard, considering the cop car parked out front. And luckily for me, an old orange truck was also in the drive. That meant Bella was home, which gave me the excuse to stay a little longer.

I climbed out of my car with the extra flyers in hand, walking through the drizzle and up the porch steps to the front door. I only had to wait a small moment until someone opened the door, and to no surprise, it was Bella. Charlie didn't seem like the type to get off the couch when someone else was home.

"Sarah," she said in slight surprise. "Hey…"

"I have the extra flyers from before," I said, holding them up. "I figured Charlie would want them back."

"Oh…yeah. Of course. Come on in."

I nodded slightly and stepped past her. Just as I figured, a game was on in the next room, which confirmed my assumption about Charlie. I had never been here before, but it seemed cozy. At the same time, it could also feel empty, under certain circumstances.

Bella stepped past me to go into the kitchen. "You want anything to drink or something? We've got juice, bottled water…"

"I'm good, thanks." I didn't mean to be so short with her, but I was a little pissed off. Why wasn't she out trying to find Jacob? They were best friends, last time I checked. Now that she was engaged to Edward, was she free to forget about others and worship the ground he walked on? If that was the case, I was out of here. I didn't want to stick around and hear about how great their relationship was. I was struggling with mine, or lack thereof.

"I'm guessing there's been no sign of him." Bella leaned against the counter as I set the flyers down on the table. My muscles locked at the assumption, my eyes closing. "Two weeks of flyers and…nothing."

"We're trying, at least," I said, and a bit too tightly. "Seth came along today. We didn't cover much ground."

"Port Angeles, right?"

"Yeah."

"Jacob doesn't seem like much of a city guy," Bella thought aloud. "I doubt he would be anywhere near there."

That small comment was all it took. I turned, my eyes cold with her as I glared. "Then why the hell aren't _you_ out there hanging up flyers?" I spat. Bella visibly tensed at the question, her eyebrows furrowing. "Are you too busy playing house with Edward to worry about your best friend? God knows that your wedding is going to be amazing, given your graduation party, right? What else _should_ you be worrying about, if not the reception or the guest list?"

"Excuse me?"

"He risked his life to protect you, Bella. Why can't you do something as small as putting up a flyer for him?" I growled. "I thought you two were best friends. Best friends don't do this… They don't act like the other is off on some vacation and having a good time. Jacob phased, dammit! He's running around in wolf form doing God-knows-what in God-knows-where! And you're just sitting here thinking about it? What the hell is the matter with you?!"

I heard footsteps coming toward the kitchen as Bella stood there in shock, her lips parted as she tried to gather what I said. I simply glared at her, not even glancing at Charlie when he appeared in the doorway.

"Something the matter, girls?" he asked.

I lifted an eyebrow at Bella, challenging her. She blinked, looking away and swallowing. "Uh, no, everything's fine."

"You're sure?" Charlie glanced between us. "I heard hollering in here, and it sure looks like someone's more than a little ticked off."

He was referring to me. It was obvious, since I wasn't trying to hide it.

"We were just talking about Jacob," I said, crossing my arms.

"Oh? No luck in Port Angeles?"

"Unfortunately," I said, voice low. "Seth and I barely managed to cover half the city. Weather wasn't cooperating too well, but we managed."

"Damn." Charlie placed his hands on his hips and stared at the floor—a typical cop stance. "That kid… He's gonna get his ass kicked when he gets home for this. Billy's worried sick."

I frowned at the thought of Jacob's father. The image of him sitting at home and just waiting was painful. "He's handling what he can, but it's not enough, you know?"

"I'll stop by later today. Hell, I'll head over there right now. Billy probably needs a buddy to watch the game with, anyway."

Bella stood quietly against the counter, her eyes still set on the floor. Charlie looked from her to me, and I decided to break the somewhat-awkward silence. "I brought you back your flyers," I said. "Sorry they're a little wet."

"It's alright. Thanks for doing what you could. How's your mother?"

"Better," I replied with a nod. "She's distracting herself, that's for sure. Seems to be helping, so…"

"Glad to hear it." Charlie smiled ever so slightly. "Give her my best."

"Will do."

He turned his attention to his daughter. "Well, Bells, what are you gonna do? You and Sarah gonna have girl time…or whatever it is you kids do?"

Bella glanced at me, a small glare in her eyes before she looked to Charlie. "Not today. I'm going over to Edward's, remember?"

"Oh, yeah, the _fiancé_…" It was clear Charlie wasn't thrilled with the word. "Say hi to Carlisle for me. I'm headin' over to Billy's."

"Bye, Dad."

He left, leaving Bella and I to stand in the kitchen in silence. It was clear that neither of us knew what to say to the other, not after my rant minutes ago. I cleared my throat.

"I guess I'll head out too," I said. "Just came to return the flyers. If you hear anything, call me."

"Sarah," Bella said softly, stopping me once I moved toward the exit. "Calling Billy may not be enough, but…I don't know what else to do. I care about Jake, you know I do. He's like a brother to me…and he _is_ my best friend. I just…"

I smiled bitterly. "Kinda hard to keep in touch with a werewolf, huh?" She hesitated before nodding slightly. "Any ideas on where he would go? I can't think of a thing."

"He'd steer clear of cities, like I said," she pointed out. "It only leaves him with the trees. He has to conceal himself in order to keep things quiet. There isn't much forestation south of here. North, maybe?"

"So Canada," I said with a roll of my eyes. "Perfect."

"You'll call too, right? If you hear anything?"

I couldn't help but smile slightly. "Only if Jacob doesn't call you first." Her smile was a reflection of mine, and I nodded to her before heading out. Charlie was already gone, like he promised, his car out of the driveway. I took off in the same direction he did, toward La Push. On the way, I passed a rather nice-looking car, one too fancy for anyone in Forks. It was obvious to me that the person driving it was Edward.

Bella would probably spill about all I said to her. Edward could either be understanding on the matter or incredibly frustrated with me. I wasn't sure which I preferred. If he was angry with me, it would be easier for me to be aggravated with him. A smile crept on my face at a random thought, one about Jacob. He would be thrilled with my thoughts of Edward in that regard. Proud, actually.

I sighed, leaning my head back against the headrest. God, I missed him. I just wanted to feel his strong arms around me, to smell his familiar scent of peppermint and pine. I missed his soothing warmth, his adorable laughter, and irresistible charm. I wanted my monster back, but he didn't seem to miss me too much. If he did, he would have called.

Sitting in my driveway, I got the urge to call his phone. It was overwhelming; I couldn't stop myself from picking up my cell and dialing him. It rang four times before going straight to his voicemail.

"_Hey, you've reached Jake. Leave a message._"

I closed my eyes at the sound of his voice. Even if it was recorded months ago, the smile in his voice was enough to lift the corners of my lips. I could hear myself faintly in the background, followed by Jacob's laughter trailing at the end. That had been a fun day; I remembered it specifically. I finally convinced him to get a cell phone, tired of bugging Billy every time I called. Jacob had been so adorable when trying to record the voicemail; I kept making him laugh. Eventually he resorted to this one, even though I did kind of ruin it at the end.

He had said it was perfect…and fended off any other girls. I smacked him for that, even though I ended up hurting myself instead. It was a werewolf thing.

"Jacob…" I said softly, unable to resist saying his name. My smile faded when I returned to reality, the memory fading away as I stared at the garage. "…Come home. I miss you. Billy and I are worried sick, and so is Charlie. I-I know you know all of this already…if you've checked my other messages…but Bella wants to see you too. So does Seth. We miss you, so just…come home, okay?"

All of my messages sounded the same. Surely he would laugh at me when he heard them all. But I couldn't resist. I just missed him so much. He was a part of me just as I was a part of him. We were incomplete without each other, something I realized when I was forced to stay with Bunny and Pops last month. It was even more obvious now that Jacob was gone without a word.

"Sarah, are you coming inside?"

Mom was waiting at the door, peering at me through the light rain. I got out of the car and started toward her in silence. I could only pray that my messages somehow got through to Jacob. Maybe he would even be nice enough to attend Bella's wedding, if nothing else. That started this, after all, and the invitation was for him and Billy, plus a guest. I was the plus one.

Maybe I would see him there.

* * *

_A/N: Thanks for reading the first chapter of this new adventure! Reviews are **highly **encouraged, as are Alerts/Follows for future updates._


	3. Abandoned

Chapter 2: Abandoned

I sometimes underestimated Hayley's powers of distraction. Her idea to go to dinner and a movie sounded lame, like it would barely keep my mind off of Jacob, but it seemed to work. For a little while at least. She checked in regularly with me over the last few weeks to see how I was doing, since it was going on five weeks now since Jacob disappeared.

Hayley claimed that summer was flying. I begged to differ, and when she saw my expression, she realized as much.

"Crap, sorry," she said, smacking herself in the forehead. "I know how hard it is for you, but…damn that loser! How can he do this to you?"

And we had been doing so well with avoiding this topic. It was bound to come up sometime, so why not now?

"Hayley—"

"I knew he was trouble from the moment I saw him last year. He had been fine up until he had his stupid growth spurt or whatever—"

"Hayley," I tried again.

"—probably steroids, right? I mean, that was what Sean always suspected but I never believed him. Don't those cause mood swings too? Maybe that's what this is to him, some kind of game or something that he thinks he can pull because he's 'depressed.' What a load of—"

"Hayley!"

Her green eyes widened, a few people around the restaurant also looking my way. I buried my head in my arms and sighed as she sputtered apologies. She was just rambling because she was angry; she didn't actually think of Jacob that way. Or maybe she did, since he was causing so much heartache and didn't even bother to call me back. A ten second voicemail would suffice.

"How long has it been now? Five weeks, close to six?" she asked after a moment of silence. I fought the urge to groan. "If my boyfriend hadn't called by now, I would have said adios."

"It's not that simple." My words were muffled in my arms.

"Why not? I know you care for the guy, but you haven't been dating that long, right?"

I lifted my head to glare at her coldly, startling her. "It doesn't matter how long or how little we've been dating," I practically hissed. "The only thing that matters is how close we've become."

She glanced to the side. "I wouldn't say you've gotten too close lately, especially this last month."

I rolled my eyes. Saying anything now would be pointless. One thing I loved and hated about Hayley was how she spoke her mind, though I felt differently under certain circumstances. Like now, I felt a bit of both; I loved her for being honest, but I hated her because she was right. Jacob deserted me and left me to deal with so much on my own—the aftermath of my father's abuse, my mother's recovery, and the upcoming divorce between the two. On top of that, there was Bella and Edward's wedding.

"Has he contacted anyone else?" Hayley asked softly, chewing on a fry. "What's that girl's name again? Bella?"

"Not her," I said with a small shake of my head. I twirled my straw around my glass. "She's one of the last people he probably wants to talk to. She's the reason he ran away."

"Because of a wedding invitation?" She laughed without humor. "That's ridiculous. He has you now. What does it matter what she does?"

"She's practically his sister. They made mud pies when they were little. That's bonding at its best."

"And he doesn't like Edward because…?"

My blue eyes locked onto her instantly, and she stared at me, waiting for an answer. But I couldn't give her one. At least, not the truth.

"It's complicated," I managed.

"Uh-huh…"

"Edward left Bella a lot like"—I closed my eyes at the sudden realization—"a lot like Jacob just now left me. She was heartbroken and Jacob was the only one who could help her. He made her feel whole again, and now she's running back to the person who caused her harm in the first place. That has to feel like a sense of betrayal, you know?"

"Guess so." Hayley tilted her head slightly as she looked at me. "But…isn't that what Jacob's doing to you?"

I stared at her in silence, not knowing how to respond. Jacob _was_ doing the same thing Edward did to Bella in the past, wasn't he? I knew that much, but…would I be the person Jacob despised? The kind of person who waltzed back to someone who crushed them?

I didn't want to be like that, ever. From an outside perspective, I saw Bella as stupid for running back to Edward so easily. But…it was different with Jacob and me; we were bound together, while Edward and Bella weren't.

"Sarah?"

I blinked. "Hm?"

"You okay?" Hayley asked.

I swallowed back the lump in my throat at the question. Any time someone asked me that, I lost it. I fought the tears this time, my hands curling into fists. "Yeah," I replied quietly. "Yeah, I'm fine."

Hayley obviously didn't believe me, but she kept her thoughts to herself. We split the bill and left the restaurant, starting toward her Jeep. We didn't have very far to walk, but as we were, I spotted a flyer that Charlie hung up on a telephone pole. I looked away instantly.

. . . . . . . . . .

Hayley was disappointed with me on the way back home. We paid to see an animated movie, which she hoped would cheer me up, but it hadn't worked. If anything, a zombie apocalypse movie would have been more fitting; I was practically the monster itself. If that were the case, at least Jacob and I would have been a little closer. Monster and monster, together forever.

As if. At this rate, my love life was a tragedy.

"How about we do each other's nails when we get home? Oh! We can play a board game with my siblings if you want." Hayley smiled over at me, being a great best friend, but I could barely meet her gaze. I wanted nothing more than to go home, get in my bed, and sleep. If that didn't work, staring at the wall would suffice. "Sarah Elizabeth," she whined. "Would you just smile already? Just a little bit?"

This caught my attention. She actually expected me to _smile_? Who did she think she was talking to?

"The more you beg, the more I begin to hate you," I muttered. She whacked me in the arm.

"Shut up! You know you love me, or else you wouldn't have let me drag you to dinner and a movie. Girls' night out and all that." She turned a corner, her house just ahead. "I'm serious about the board games, though. You did mention that you loved Clue once."

"Yeah, but those are mysteries I can actually solve."

Hayley put the car in park, the two of us now just outside her house. I glanced over at my car. If I was quick, I could make a run for it. Before I could even lift a hand, Hayley locked the doors.

Damn it.

"You've barely talked to me the entire way home," she started. Her head tilted, her copper hair falling over her shoulder. "You know I'm here for you. I wouldn't be trying so hard if it wasn't true."

"I know," I sighed.

"Then what's the deal? Is it because I'm not helping you put up the flyers?"

"No."

"Did we not hang out enough the past couple weeks? I know you had a tough time with your mom lately, and you-know-who certainly didn't help things. Maybe I should have been over more to keep you company or distract you or something."

"No, it's not that."

"Then what is it?"

I pushed my hair away from my face, holding my hand against my forehead as I leaned against the door. "I'm scared, okay?" I finally admitted. "I'm scared that my boyfriend either doesn't give a damn about our relationship or he's hurt. He won't call me back, he won't even write me a damn email, and he won't come home. On top of that, my dad's in jail, my mom just got over an extreme case of paranoia, and my summer has completely sucked." I turned my head, meeting Hayley's gaze. "Tell me again why I should be smiling."

She looked away, her lips tightly shut. Apparently I made my point. We sat in the car for another few minutes before she unlocked the doors. "…If you want, you're free to go home."

"I know that if I go home, I'll do nothing but sulk," I admitted. "Then again, what's the difference? I'm doing it anyway."

"Maybe you just need to rest. You said yourself that you haven't gotten much sleep lately."

"I have nightmares every time I sleep. Those aren't exactly peaceful."

"Then what do you want to do, Sarah?" Hayley asked, exasperated. I stared at her, wide-eyed. "Nothing seems to be good enough for you anymore. Is Jacob the only person that can make you happy?"

"N-no…"

"I hang out with you whenever I'm not babysitting. We go to a movie and dinner and do the whole girls' night out thing like we're supposed to at sixteen," she said. "We even have girl talk, which is supposed to make things so much easier! That's what's normal with girls our age, you know? We vent and we feel better. That's how it's supposed to be."

"My life isn't exactly normal, okay?" I retorted.

"Why, because you're a victim to domestic abuse? That's so common nowadays."

I was shocked she even said that. It was like she didn't even care that my family was suffering. "That's not what I was talking about, but you're right," I said, keeping calm, just like I often advised Jacob. I was a victim, even if not directly.

One of Hayley's eyebrows lifted in question. "Then what _were_ you talking about?"

I looked away instantly, knowing that I couldn't go any farther with this. I bit my lip and closed my eyes, fighting the urge to scream. Damn Jacob! As much of a blessing as I knew he could be, right now it felt as if he was torturing me. Why did he have to abandon me?

"…I've gotta go," I murmured, climbing out of the jeep. Hayley said my name before she was cut off by the door.

I wordlessly walked to my car, got in, and drove off. There was no specific destination in mind; I just drove. How many times had I done this lately? I was blowing so much money by wasting gas like this, but what else was I supposed to do? I wasn't really that comfortable at home; there were too many memories. Going to Jacob's was a definite no. Sam and Emily's house was off-limits for the same reason. There were too many memories here. Maybe I should have just gone back to Bunny and Pops'.

"Shit!" I slammed on my brakes and skidded to a halt. I was so busy sulking that I neglected to pay attention to the road. Following a bend, I'd barely had enough time to react to the roadblock in front of me.

Standing in the middle of the road were multiple shirtless men and one woman dressed in a tank top and shorts. It was the wolf pack, I soon realized. I breathed heavily in fright as I stared at them all, wide-eyed. "What the hell?" I said to myself, unbuckling my seatbelt and exiting the car. I stepped around the door, many dark eyes following my every move. "What do you think you're doing?"

"Sarah," Seth said, taking a step forward. "Listen, we're all worried about you. We don't want—"

"What Seth is trying to say," Leah interrupted, "is that you need to stop wallowing in your misery and wait for Jake to come back."

I instantly glared at her. She was just like Hayley with her honesty. "Sorry?"

"Leah," Sam warned lowly, glancing over at the young woman, who rolled her eyes. He then turned to me. "You know our connection with one another as a pack. You can assume what we've gathered from Seth's thoughts."

Right. My misery, as Leah put it.

"What is this, an intervention?" I asked. They couldn't be serious.

"You kinda need one." Embry was there too, not that I had really looked at him recently. He was the same, though his hair was longer; it had grown over the past five or six weeks. Quil's too.

"You have your bond with Jacob and I have mine," I said, looking at all of them. "I'd like to believe mine's a bit stronger…"

"It is," Sam said with a nod. "No bond is as strong as that with an imprint. But what your bond is lacking is faith."

"Faith?"

Quil stuffed his hands in his pockets. "You don't believe in Jake. As his imprint, you should, more than any of us." He gestured to the pack with his eyes.

"We know that you're worried Jake's got strong feelings for Bella," Leah said, arms crossed over her chest. The attitude she wore was present in her posture, but her eyes seemed to hold a bit of sympathy. Perhaps she could relate. "But like my brother told you, he feels that way towards _you_ now. Bella's like family, like all of us." She shrugged. "He's got stronger ties to you than he will to anybody."

"That's exactly right," Sam agreed. I was positive that he could relate; he did imprint on Emily, who was now his fiancée.

He approached me, and as I stood there, knees locked and eyes hard, he didn't hesitate putting his hands on my shoulders. The warmth was similar to Jacob's, but it wasn't the same—not nearly as comforting. But Sam's touch did remind me of him, and I closed my eyes, pretending it was Jacob in front of me. The warm smile and gentle eyes, the security that came with them... I missed it. As soon as Sam spoke, however, the image of the boy I longed for disappeared.

"Jacob's bond with you is special, and if I know Jake like I think I do, he's thinking of you at this very second," he continued. "In fact, you're all he's thinking about. Distance between a pack member and his imprint is a weakness. We ache. Given the amount of time he's been gone, Jacob's hurting just as much as you are."

Sam's declaration encouraged tears, which were forming when I was driving. He only made it worse, to the point where I had to fight my quivering lip. "…Then why isn't he coming home?" I asked weakly.

"I heard his thoughts," Sam assured me. "We all did. He needs time to cool down. Bella's wedding is something he hates to think about. Seeing the invitation only reminded him of what's to come."

"What, that he might have to hurt her if she becomes one of them?"

"Yes." The alpha nodded. "The treaty would be broken if that were to happen. We're all upset by it, but there's nothing we can do until the Cold One poses a threat to Bella. Right now, that's not the case. Jacob knows that. His emotions are intensified because of his bloodline, but he'll calm down. That, I can assure you."

"Besides," Seth said, coming up to join Sam by my side, "Jacob wouldn't miss Bella's wedding for the world. She's his best friend! Of course he's gonna be there! If he's not home early, you can bet on seeing him then."

I gazed at Seth in silence. His brown eyes were genuine, full of hope. He wanted to see Jacob too; the two of them were pretty close. He really meant what he said, and I couldn't help but lift a hand to set on his arm, no longer restricted by Sam's warm grasp on my shoulders. "Thank you, Seth."

"You bet!"

A tear trickled down my cheek just then, and I hastily wiped it away before any of the guys or Leah could say anything. They would remember this and show it to Jacob, whenever he came back. It sucked that I still doubted he would return soon, but Bella and Edward's wedding was only a few weeks away. I could last until then…maybe.

"Why don't you come join us for dinner?" Sam offered gently. The proposal was one I didn't expect, but it was generous. Like he said, I was family now, which meant I was welcome to join them any time I wanted. "I'm sure Emily would be happy to see you after all this time."

I hadn't been there in about six weeks now. She probably was concerned, given her motherly nature.

"I've already eaten," I revealed, my voice lacking any strength. I rubbed under my eye again to rid the moisture from my face. "My friend Hayley took me to dinner earlier."

"Then come by to at least hang out with us," Seth chimed in, glancing at Sam briefly for approval. The older man shrugged. "C'mon, please? I'll even ride there with you, if that's okay."

I wasn't sure of whom he was asking permission, Sam or me. As if I could refuse Seth; he was too genuine and sweet to turn down. Upon hearing Sam say it was alright, I knew who he was truly asking. Sam directed the others to head back to his place while Seth made his way to the passenger seat. As I returned to my car, I caught the multiple transformations from human to wolf. A memory flashed before my eyes, one of Jacob phasing as he ran away from me, and I gripped the edge of my car door in pain.

I don't know how Bella went so many months without Edward at her side. It had only been a little over a month and I was suffering, nearly suffocating from the darkness that seemed to surround me, even in daylight. I didn't have my sun.

"Sarah?"

I blinked, turning my head and seeing Seth leaning over the center console. My ability to daydream had increased greatly since Jacob's disappearance, which was probably unhealthy. Regardless, Seth and the others were around to keep me occupied. Well, the pack at least. It was sad, really, how much I wanted to get away from my human friends and so desperately sought the company of the wolves.

They were a connection to Jacob, I then realized. The hole in my chest was almost complete when I was with them, but only for a moment. As soon as I returned to solitude, the hole returned, as deep and dark as an abyss. Then again, thoughts like that were only making matters worse. All I had to do until Jacob came home was stay distracted. It would happen one way or another.

But what, or shall I say who, would be my distraction?

* * *

_A/N: Hope you enjoyed! Put it on **Alert** for future updates! Oh, and please **Review**. :)_


	4. Wishful Thinking

Chapter 3: Wishful Thinking

It was August before I knew it. Summer had come and gone almost too quickly, but then again, it couldn't have ended fast enough. With school just around the corner, I would have more of a distraction. That wasn't to say that the pack wasn't doing enough to help me; they were amazing, taking me in nearly every day after the confrontation on the road. I apologized countless times for being like the annoying little sister in the equation, but they assured me it was okay, or pinned the label on Leah. She wasn't too pleased with the classification, to say the least.

As I had always suspected, the boys were normal teenagers, despite their responsibilities. They had me playing video games every now and again, or they would take me out to watch them cliff-dive. I never did the act myself; I was too afraid of heights to even sit near the edge without Embry or Quil to cling to. If not cliff-diving or video games, they had weekly bonfires on the cliff where the council meetings were held. I even got to meet Quil's little lady, Claire. The way he interacted with her was almost too much; Emily and I were cooing constantly, as were the other boys, if only to get under Quil's skin.

Nobody mentioned Jacob. It was clear that he was on everyone's mind at some point or another, but not a word was spoken about him, nor was his name brought up in conversation. Billy didn't even say anything when we saw each other. It was clear that he was worried for his son more than anyone—almost as much as me, if not more—but he smiled nonetheless. Distractions were healthy in times like these.

Seeing Billy without his son always hurt me inside, which was why I made time to spend with my mom too. The weeks following her recovery had been good to her; she even went out with her coworkers from time to time. When neither of us had others to see, we went out to dinner or rented movies. It was good mother-daughter time, which I cherished.

Sean and Ryan finally made it back into town at the beginning of the month, and Katie was soon to follow. Natalie's work schedule eased up at the end of July, so she was ready for all of us to hang out again when August rolled around. As for Hayley and me, we resolved our differences. She begged time and time again for me to be honest, but I continued to dodge the question. The truth couldn't be told; the secret was too sacred, even for a best friend. She was never pleased with the answer, but she came to accept it…for now.

The girls and I went back-to-school shopping together, just to get it out of the way. Besides, shopping this early in August guaranteed us the best supplies, since school didn't start until the beginning of September. Seattle was busy, as usual, but we managed to get what we needed.

"So what now?" Katie asked as the four of us walked downtown. We ditched our school bags in Natalie's car and decided to walk, since the weather was cooperating today; sunny and warm. "Lunch?"

"Actually," I piped, catching their attention, "there's something I've put off for a while that I need to get done."

"What is it?" Natalie tucked some blonde hair behind her ear, avoiding another pedestrian as she and Katie walked ahead. The streets were too busy for the four of us to walk in a straight line.

I looked at the stores we passed. "A wedding's coming up. I need a dress."

Hayley's eyes found me then, eyebrows coming together. "Bella's wedding?"

Katie and Natalie stopped ahead of us, both glancing over their shoulders. "The girl from Forks?" Katie checked. When I nodded, her eyes widened. "She's getting _married_?"

"Mm," I hummed. "She and I have talked a little. She invited me…"

"…And you-know-who?" Natalie finished, voice soft and cautious. Hayley made everyone promise not to say his name around me, as to not bring up uncomfortable thoughts. But even "you-know-who" was bad enough.

"I was the plus one."

Katie gazed at me like I had grown two heads. "And you're still going? Why?"

"…He's her best friend," I told them quietly, shrugging a little. "He wouldn't miss her wedding for the world."

The sounds of the city were the only response. The girls seemed to catch the implication.

Hayley hooked her arm in mine. "Well then, let's go get you a dress. You can't upstage the bride, but you can definitely look hot for the boy when he returns."

I couldn't help but smile as Katie directed us to a nearby store, one where her oldest sister bought her prom dress. They knew money was tight right now. As from the looks of the place, it seemed inexpensive enough. After asking my dress size, the three of them split from me to browse the racks. I went off on my own and did the same.

Within ten minutes I had fifteen dresses to choose from, including a few of my own. After being ushered to the dressing rooms, I modeled some of the dresses for the girls. Some were immediate no's, and others were no-brainers. However, we agreed that I needed to try on all of them, just in case. Thankfully I followed that advice, because when I gazed at myself in the mirror, the current dress was the best one yet.

A lovely sky blue dress graced my form, ending just at the knee. The black waistline bow accented my light curves, and the lace was dainty and sweet. It was strapless and body-hugging, but appropriate. The dress was elegant yet casual; perfect for a wedding party.

I stepped out of the dressing room and the girls' eyes grew. I smoothed the front of the dress, looking down at it before glancing back up at them. "So…what do you think?" I asked, nervous.

There was a small silence before Hayley gasped. "Pretty…" she sighed dreamily, earning hums of agreement from Katie and Natalie.

"It's so…you," Natalie added with a tilt of her head. "It just…fits you, you know? Calm and collected, yet sweet and fun."

"And you-know-who is going to _love_ it!" Katie clapped her hands together, while I fought a blush. "Oh my God, this is great. We have to get some shoes, black ones. Oh! We need heels, and then we have to get some jewelry…" She rose from her seat and grabbed Hayley's hand. "Hales, come with me."

Hayley sent me a desperate glance before she was dragged out of my sight. Natalie and I giggled, and I realized then that I had only laughed a few times over the summer. The boys at Sam and Emily's helped with that, but so did the girls. They were all great, and they were magnificent distractions.

I turned to look in the mirror set up outside the stalls. I could see the front and the sides of the dress from how the mirror was designed. I turned and gazed over my shoulder at the back, and it really was a lovely dress. It showed skin, but not too much.

Katie was right—Jacob would love it. I really hoped he would be there to see me so dressed up. We never got a chance to see each other so decked out before; it would definitely be interesting. I could just picture him, clad in a dress shirt and black slacks. He would be…perfect.

Natalie came up to look over my shoulder at my reflection. She wore a small smile. "What do _you_ think?" she asked me, genuinely curious for my opinion. "Is it worth the money?"

"Forty-five dollars is practically a steal," I told her with a faint smirk. She giggled lightly. "Not too dressy, but not too casual either. I like it."

"You think he will too?"

"I can't see him hating it." He would never degrade me; that wasn't how imprinting worked. Unconditional love and adoration were guaranteed for the rest of my life…if Jacob ever came back.

Natalie gazed at me in silence for the next moment, which caused me to turn to her. The question was written on my face, and she shook her head slightly. "It's nothing," she said. "I just think that if Jacob misses this, he's nuts. If what you said is true, and he does come home for Bella's wedding, I doubt he'll be disappointed."

"Thank you." I couldn't help but smile, heat rushing to my cheeks at the compliment. I hoped what she said was true. Hell, I hoped what _I_ said was true. Bella wouldn't be the only one upset that he didn't show up.

"I found wedges!" Katie squealed, rushing quickly back to the fitting room. She presented them to me and I stepped in, having to grab her shoulder to support myself. Her face twisted. "You're gonna have to break those in."

"In a few days? What, will I have to march around the house in them?"

"If that's what it takes." She placed her hands on her hips, typically assertive. I sighed and started forward, having to grab the mirror a few steps off. Bella's wedding was in less than a week. I would be lucky to break these in by then without a few blisters.

"How much?" I asked, stepping out of them and looking for the price tag.

"Twenty," Hayley answered, arms crossed. "Not too much for a decent set of wedges. What do you think?"

I placed the shoes on the bench in the room, brushing some hair out of my face. "I have zero heels at home, and I don't own good enough dresses. They'll have to do."

"Have to do?" Katie rolled her eyes. "Give me a break. You love them both, and so do we. We wouldn't be telling you to get them if they weren't worth it."

"Alright, alright. Sold." I started back toward the stall and closed the door to get changed. "But I'm not paying to get my hair done."

"No biggie," Hayley chimed. "I'll do it for free!"

I stepped out of the stall after a couple minutes, the dress hung on its hanger. "The wedding's the thirteenth. Can you schedule me in?"

"Anything for you, best friend," Hayley sang with a smile. "Now c'mon, let's get lunch. I'm starving."

. . . . . . . . . .

"_Hey, you've reached Jake. Leave a message._"

I heard the laughter at the end of the recording, smiling to myself as I sat in my room. Over the past two months, I'd called Jacob's phone at least fifty times. After the first few calls in the very beginning, I figured out that if he were in wolf form, he wouldn't be able to carry his phone on him. I called anyway, just to hear his voice. He was so happy then, and now he was miserable.

Bella did this to him, and just as Paul complained a few days ago, it was a time too many. She called every now and then to ask Billy if anything had changed; she even called once when I was there, and I had to tell her there had still been no signs of him. I truly believed she was heartbroken, because even if we only spoke a few times, she didn't sound like herself. As if I knew who that truly was. I could only go off what Jacob told me in the past.

I realized that the voicemail was just dead air, so I hung up the phone. I stared at it for a while, waiting for it to ring and his picture to show up on the screen, but it never came. How was I supposed to get anything done when he was all I thought about? Besides, there wasn't any summer homework, my mother was away at work, and the weather sucked. It was an ugly day altogether.

What was a girl to do?

I tried reading a book, but after an hour I got tired of it. The television was my next idea, but that soon failed and I searched pointless things on the net. Not even pictures of celeb photobombs or funny memes could cheer me up.

It was official: I had sunken into a dark abyss.

It was then that it dawned on me. Bella had been through this once before, so maybe she could give me some advice. I rose from my seat and grabbed my shoes. Since I didn't know her number, going over there was my only other choice. I drove through the heavy rainstorm and found her home in Forks, seeing that the truck was parked near the side of the house and a new car was sitting in the driveway.

"A Mercedes?" I thought aloud, pulling up on the side of the road. It had to be one of Edward's cars, or at least the doctor's. It was a slick ride, one Jacob would probably enjoy viewing under the hood.

I got out of the car before he could cloud my mind, running through the rain to the front door. Charlie answered it instead of Bella, which alerted me that she was either sleeping or out of the house. "Oh, um, hi Charlie," I greeted softly.

"Hey, kid. Looking for Bells?" I nodded and he looked behind me, as if annoyed. "She's over at the Cullens' place. You can probably find her there."

"Oh…Where is that again?" I knew it was on the invitation, but that had been left at Billy's.

He proceeded to give me the directions, telling me that the entrance was hidden and easily missed sometimes. "One more thing," he said, stopping me. "The Cullens are a…weird bunch. Different, I guess. They rarely get visitors, so…"

I curled one of my hands into a fist. I couldn't imagine why.

"Don't be surprised," I finished for him. He nodded with a weak smile. "Thanks, Charlie." I turned and stepped out into the rain, squinting through the downpour.

"Sarah," Charlie called, halting me again. I turned, my hood over my head to repel some of the rain. "…If you hear anything about Jake, don't hesitate to call."

"You got it."

. . . . . . . . . .

I thought Charlie had meant for me to get lost after I followed his instructions. The hidden entrance was difficult to find, but once I was on it, I couldn't see a house anywhere. The road went on for at least two miles before something white finally came into view. After passing a few more trees, I could see it clearly: the Cullen residence.

I hadn't really looked at the house when I was here before, simply because I was so afraid of meeting the Cullens for the first time. But here I was now, alone and without my protector.

He was going to kill me for this, but only if he found out.

Of course the home was beautiful. Did I expect anything different? From the few times I'd seen the Cullens, that being Edward, Alice, Jasper, and Carlisle, it seemed only fitting that their home would be gorgeous. It was three stories tall with large windows, a porch wrapping around the first floor. The exterior was a soft white, and trees surrounded the path to ensure that the shade reached the house. It was one of the most beautiful homes I had ever seen, something elegant yet timeless.

Surely Alice could see me coming, or Edward could hear my thoughts, so I decided to humor them.

_Knock, knock._

I climbed out of my car, shutting the door and approaching the porch in the rain. The door, as expected, was a rich wood, fitting beautifully with the exterior. I didn't even have to wait, the door opening as I lifted a hand to knock.

I was met with amber eyes and a confused expression, but a smile graced her face anyway. "Sarah, right?" she said, her voice like wind chimes. "I saw you coming."

"Alice," I said with a small nod.

Her eyes flitted over me quickly before they turned warm, something I thought was impossible for a vampire. "I won't hurt you," she assured me. The words alarmed me, my eyebrows furrowing as I naturally stiffened. She wasn't the mind reader, yet she could tell how nervous I was? "We drink from animals, not humans. All of us. It's okay."

"Um…"

"Really, it's fine!" she promised. Stepping aside, she opened the door for me. "Come on in."

Edward was probably laughing at my fear-induced thoughts. I hesitated another moment before following her request and stepping into the home. What greeted my eyes was also to be expected, but I couldn't help but stare in awe.

The room before me was wide and open, spacious to accommodate its inhabitants. The south wall was completely covered in glass for a view of the backyard, which held a river I hadn't known existed until now. A raised portion of the room was to my left, a grand piano sitting atop the wooden floor. Not too far from it was what I perceived to be the kitchen and the dining room. Many pieces of furniture decorated the area, a sitting and living area nearby, as well as a few computers and a flat-screen. Pictures and paintings hung on the walls, the ceiling high-beamed, and the floors covered in carpet and wood.

It was amazing.

"It looks a lot different when there's a party inside, huh?" Alice stood next to me and gazed around the room with me. I could only nod, spotting a staircase to the west. "So, what do you need? Everyone's making last-minute preparations for the wedding, so they're running around a bit."

I gazed at her, immediately intimidated by her looks, and decided to stare at my shoes. "Um…I was wondering if I could talk to Bella. Charlie told me she was here. It's kind of important."

"Of course." Alice nodded. "I'll go see if the bride-to-be is busy. Make yourself at home!"

She was gone in seconds, her speed proving useful as she disappeared. I wiped my shoes thoroughly on the rug and approached one of the family collages hanging above one of the couches. The frame was full of pictures from the past, as early as the 1920s, I figured. The family grew bigger in each picture, and for a few decades, it was the same people, but then there was a picture of Edward and Bella. I couldn't help but smile a little. Their feelings for each other were clear in the photo, if the wedding didn't say enough.

Footsteps came from the opposite side of the room, and I turned around to see Bella and Edward coming toward me, Alice right behind them. Bella looked surprised to see me, but Edward smirked at me. Clearly my joke upon arrival amused him enough.

"Hey," Bella said, her hair in waves around her shoulders. Clearly someone had been trying some hairstyles on her in preparation for the wedding. "We weren't really expecting anyone. Everything okay?"

I wasn't sure what to say, my teeth pinching my lip as I made sense of my thoughts. My eyes briefly locked with Edward's, the vampire studying me for a moment as he read my mind.

"She's seeking advice about Jacob," he told his fiancée, looking to her as she grew puzzled. It wasn't that big of a surprise; I didn't really expect this either.

"Jacob?" she repeated. "Why? Is he alright?"

"He's fine," Edward said, "as far as anyone knows. She just needs some coping methods."

Bella's eyes found me, and she looked troubled. Those months were ones she probably didn't want to relive, but I was desperate. I couldn't sit around and wait anymore. It hadn't been enough up to this point, and I doubted it was going to be now.

"Yeah…sure," she finally replied. Alice stepped forward and grabbed her brother's arm.

"We should give them some privacy," she told him gently. He nodded and placed a soft kiss to Bella's hair before departing, a message that was easily interpreted: "Don't worry too much." He turned away and walked with Alice, who glanced back at us with a reassuring smile.

Once the two of them left, Bella invited me to sit down. She took one side of the couch while I took the other, in which she drew up her knees and leaned an elbow against the back of the sofa. I tried not to ruin the cushions, since I was wet from the storm.

"…Have you heard from him at all?" she asked after a long moment of silence. I shook my head and she lifted a hand to her head, resting it against her palm. "Damn that kid. I'm gonna kill him when he gets back. He's making me worried sick!"

"You and me both," I muttered. She smiled briefly.

"I remember how I looked when I saw my reflection back then," she said, referring to her few months without Edward. "You remind me of myself."

So I looked like hell. Fantastic.

"It's definitely not a good feeling, knowing that the person you love is out there and you're just stuck, waiting…"

I lowered my eyes to my lap instantly at the L word. It was always lingering somewhere. I knew that my heart longed for Jacob, more than anything. If that wasn't love, then what was? But at the same time, who was to say that he loved me back? It had only been a few months that we'd been dating, after all.

"But you find ways to make the time pass faster. Jacob was my outlet," Bella told me. She smiled a little at the memory of her best friend. "He filled that void in my chest. It was weird, but it was comforting. While Edward was gone, that full feeling was my addiction. I sought it whenever I could, which was why Jake and I got so close."

I smiled slightly. "He enjoyed your company."

Her lips widened at my assurance. "But when Jake stopped calling, before I knew about the wolves, I had to find another way to cope. Whenever I was near danger, Edward showed up."

"He…showed up?" I asked, confused.

She pulled at her hair a bit, biting her lip. "Um…not physically. It was my mind playing tricks on me, I guess. I pictured him and what he would say to me in that kind of situation. I _craved_ the sight of him," she explained. "It was unhealthy. I cliff-dived and nearly got myself killed just so I could see him. Jake saved me, but Edward thought I was actually dead after Alice saw me jump. Alice and I had to rush to Italy to keep him from showing himself in the sunlight."

"Or he would have died too," I assumed. She nodded and I let out a low whistle. "Good grief…"

"Don't do anything reckless to deal with the sense of loss. That imprint bond… That's so strong that Jake… He wouldn't be able to live without you. Your case would be worse than mine and Edward's."

My sight suddenly began to blur, and I lowered my gaze to the carpet. "Right."

I could never put Jacob through that kind of torment. It would break his heart. Just the thought of it tore me up inside. What he was making me go through was horrible enough.

"Have you been spending time with your friends or anything?" Bella asked after a long moment of silence. I nodded. "That's good. Like I told you, it helped me a lot."

"But it's not enough, Bella," I said. A tear managed to trickle down my cheek, and I wiped it way quickly. "I can't spend every waking moment with my friends. I'll drive them crazy. I think even Sam and Emily are getting tired of having me over at their place." I buried my head in my hands. "He's gotta come home soon. What could he possibly be doing anyway?"

There was another silence, this one more uncomfortable than the last. A few more tears fell, but they passed quickly before Bella and I made eye contact again. Her expression was different this time; it held more guilt than sorrow.

"I can't tell you how sorry I am for doing this to you guys," she finally admitted. She moved on the couch, obviously uneasy. "I just wanted my best friend at my wedding, that's all. I didn't know that he would run away because of it!"

This was the first time I had actually seen her grief. It was…surprising. Bella seemed like the type that didn't let her emotions show all that often; the strong one, in almost all situations. Jacob was important to both of us, and it showed by the looks on our faces.

"…He doesn't want you to throw your life away," I finally said. Her brown eyes found me then, questioning what I meant, but then it clicked for her. "He just wants you to experience things as a human. I mean…who wants their best friend to become their worst enemy?"

"Trust me," Bella said, pushing her hair back. "That is the _last_ thing I want. I can barely stand the constant fighting between him and Edward." She sighed heavily, closing her eyes. "I love Edward, though. Jacob knows that. And this is what I want. I just need to know that I have his blessing."

I gazed at her for a moment, recalling the connection Jacob told me the two of them shared. "…You're his sister, Bella." Her lip nearly quivered, but she fought it with her teeth. "He'll love you no matter what you do. From the moment you two made mud pies you were family. If you do decide to turn, Jacob won't fight you like he was born to. He'll _protect_ you."

Bella lifted her head. The expression she wore proved that she hadn't thought of the outcome in that way before, which meant I helped something to click in her head. She smiled a little before diverting her gaze.

"She's right, you know." The two of us turned our heads to see Edward leaning his shoulder against one of the walls. He smiled at Bella before glancing at me. "Sarah's thoughts are void of any doubt," he declared. "From what I know of your relationship with Jacob, he will do what he can to keep you safe. That's what he and I have in common. Your safety is the one thing the two of us can agree on."

I couldn't help but smile. My monster had a great heart. It was good to know that even his mortal enemy could see that. Looking at Edward, I could see his lips turn up at one side in amusement. There I went again, humoring him with my head.

Bella rose to her feet and approached Edward. He took her into his arms immediately, holding her delicately, as if she were made of glass. Jacob had to do the same with me, considering his strength. Resting her head against Edward's chest, Bella looked to me.

"I guess they can get along sometimes, despite their differences."

I couldn't suppress the few chuckles that escaped me. If Jacob were to witness this, I was sure his face would be priceless. The idea of getting along with Edward didn't even occur to him, but the fact that Edward admitted to it probably would have made him feel uncomfortable. A good uncomfortable, though, because he wouldn't be able to disagree.

"I hear laughter!" Alice sang, entering the room with light footsteps. "That's always a good sign! Everything went well out here, I assume."

"Mm," I hummed, while Bella nodded as well.

"We talked a few things over," the bride-to-be stated. "I think we understand each other a little better."

"Wonderful," Alice said with a smile. "I hope that means the future Mrs. Cullen will be able to get her beauty sleep the next few nights. The big day is coming!"

"I'll be fine."

"I'll believe that when I see it." The wedding enthusiast turned to me. "Speaking of the big day, we could always use a helping hand. Would you be interested? It'd be a good way to get your mind away from other troubling matters."

My eyes widened instantly. "Oh, um… I-I couldn't intrude—"

"Don't be silly!" Alice made her way to me and reached for my hand. Her touch was ice cold, but I was so caught up in the idea of helping with a wedding that I didn't pay attention to it. "It was an invitation. Now c'mon, you seem rather stylish. I need help picking out a dress."

Edward made a face. "You said helping with the _wedding_, Alice."

She stopped next to her brother. "A dress for the maid of honor _is_ helping with the wedding," she stated. She then stuck her tongue out at him before pulling me further into the house. I caught Edward and Bella's expressions just before I was out of their sight.

They wished me luck, and I had a feeling I would need it.

* * *

_A/N: Sorry for the kinda-late update, but it's here now! Please leave your thoughts on the chapter. I would love to hear them!_


	5. Switching Roles

Chapter 4: Switching Roles

Hanging out with vampires was a lot different than I imagined.

I always pictured the house covered in black and blood red, stone floors leading to coffins, and zero windows. Turns out, my perception was completely off. Alice's room was light and open, welcoming even. It was kind of breathtaking, but she was awfully fashionable; it should have been expected.

Then again, I didn't exactly plan on getting pulled up to her room to help her choose outfits. Alice had a theme going, one of the 1920s, since that was when she turned. It was cute and personal, which was a neat way for her to bring her own taste to the wedding. But the girl had a degree in fashion design, so her excellent taste in fashion was a no-brainer, to most. I barely knew her, after all.

Jacob always made the Cullens out to be heartless and nasty, but they were actually very nice. Alice was sweet and spunky, and Edward was nothing but a gentleman. The last time I saw Jasper, he wasn't exactly friendly. But Alice assured me he was a sweetheart; he came from Texas, so it was in his blood. It actually made me eager to see him again. What girl could reject good old southern hospitality?

"Now I was thinking about this one." Alice turned, holding the dress up to her small form. We had been through at least thirty dresses by now, and I was a little worn out, but she kept it interesting by switching up the styles.

"Hmm…" I tilted my head to the side, glancing from Alice's awaiting face to the dress repeatedly. "…I think that'll work."

"You _think_?" she repeated, exasperated. My eyes widened.

"No, don't take it the wrong way!" I insisted, waving my hands. "I just mean that we found the one you'll wear."

"Oh."

"Besides, couldn't you see the outcome already?"

She smiled a little, shaking her head. "No. This was kind of an out-of-the-blue thing. My visions didn't pick up on it in time."

"Well…surprise?" I tried with a smile. Alice only giggled.

It was amazing how comfortable she made me feel. And here I thought I would be backed against the wall in terror. My previous experiences weren't so great with vampires, so this was strange.

"You know something," she started, hanging the dress up by the mirror. She floated over, perching herself on the bay seat next to me, where I rested with my arms around my knees. "I wasn't sure how this was going to go. I mean, you're with a wolf, and quite frankly…you smell horrid."

I blinked, then sniffing my shirt. I smelled nothing but my body spray; apparently it wasn't doing its job. "Sorry."

"Oh, don't be. I'm used to Bella coming back all the time smelling like you." She shrugged. "The dog has his mate. It can't be helped."

I smiled weakly before diverting my gaze, looking out her window as the rain pelted the glass. It was quiet between us, which only triggered unwelcome thoughts. She didn't say his name, but "dog" was enough for me to think of his face. My smile gradually faded as I took in the word "mate" as well. At this rate, there was no such thing. Wolves didn't ditch their mates for months at a time, as far as I knew.

"Sarah?" Alice called, catching my attention. Her gold eyes were gentle, the opposite of what I imagined before meeting her. Just like the boys, she was human, even if her heart wasn't beating anymore; she still felt emotions. Right now, she was experiencing sympathy, which was directed towards me. "My opinion may be somewhat biased, but…it's not to the point where I hate Jacob."

She caught my wince at the name, and she placed a cold hand on my knee. I was used to a warm touch, so I stiffened slightly. But Alice's tenderness calmed me.

"I mean it," she assured me. "When we were fighting Victoria, I helped him when he was in a tight spot. Not the one where he got injured of course, since I couldn't see it coming. But what I'm trying to say is that if I hated him, I wouldn't have accepted his help in the battle, and I wouldn't have lent him a hand when he needed it."

"So you guys are…friends?"

"Oh goodness, no!" Alice stared at me, appalled. "It will take centuries for that to happen, and he won't even have that long."

I couldn't help but smile slightly. "Okay, so you're comrades…"

"Right. Much better."

"He'll be glad to hear that, I'm sure."

Alice laughed a little. "I can just see his face now. I've seen that pup angry before. He doesn't scare me too much, but humans like you could easily be intimidated."

"I've seen that look more than once."

"Not directed at you, I hope."

"No," I said with a small shake of my head. "I was threatened once or twice, and then there was the invitation…"

Alice's eyes softened and a silence fell over us, the pitter-patter of the rain the only noise in the room. She patted my knee gently before rising, cleaning up the dresses she had set out on a nearby couch. "You two will be fine. If Jacob is as crazy about you as he was for Bella, I'm surprised he's stayed away this long."

Maybe that was just it. Jacob wasn't as crazy about me. That was why he was gone so long. Maybe he didn't want to come back.

But what about all the times we shared? All the laughter and the fun? He couldn't honestly hate or forget it so easily…

I glared at my knees. Since when was I so hard on myself? Wallowing in self-pity definitely wasn't me. Leah even told me to knock it off a few weeks ago. It took one heartbroken girl to reach another. Talk about sad.

"Alice?"

The vampire whirled around, eyes alight in recognition. "Jasper!" she cooed, moving to his side instantly. She placed a brief kiss to his lips. "We have a visitor."

"So I noticed." His southern drawl was obvious. How didn't I notice it before? His amber eyes found my blue. "The smell gave you away, doll."

"That bad, huh?"

The two of them nodded, and I couldn't help but roll my eyes. Jasper smirked. "Sorry we couldn't meet under better circumstances before. Jasper Hale."

"Sarah Caldwell," I said with a small wave. "Nice to meet you."

"Wolf girl, I assume."

I looked to Alice, who only shrugged her shoulders. "Do you guys talk about me a lot or something?" I asked, perplexed.

"Once in a while," Alice replied. "Whenever Bella brings up Jacob, your name somehow eases its way into the conversation."

"Good or bad?"

"Good, mostly." Jasper glanced to Alice. "Make any rash decisions, though, and that could change."

"I haven't seen anything," she assured me. "You're in the clear for now."

"Good to know." I rose to my feet, fixing my shirt. "I guess I'll leave you two lovebirds alone. Which way do I go to get out of here?"

"Take your first left down the hall. You'll find the staircase there."

"Thanks, Alice."

I was just out of the room when she hollered for me. "I almost forgot! Thank you so much for your input. I really appreciate it."

I shrugged. "No big deal." I made eye contact with Jasper one last time, so I sent him a small nod in goodbye. He returned it kindly.

I made my way downstairs like Alice told me, hearing a bit of conversation happening down in the living area. It was hard to sneak by without being noticed, but I hoped to slip by and kept my head down. Of course, it didn't exactly work; they could smell me a mile away.

"You're leaving?" Bella was busy looking through a few books, probably for food preferences. Humans were going to be at the wedding, after all. "Did Alice finally give you a break? It's been nearly two hours."

I tucked some of my hair behind my ear, glancing toward the floor. There were almost too many golden eyes on me at that moment. The doctor was in, as were his wife and a beautiful blonde girl I didn't know. I thought looking at Alice was hard at first; it was nearly impossible with the newest girl.

"She's a good distraction, and actually very entertaining." I took a small step toward the group resting on the furniture. "You could've warned me, though."

A few of them laughed aloud, and with a quick glance in the blonde's direction, I swear she was smirking a little. Half-amused was better than nothing, I guess.

"Alice is one of a kind," Carlisle told me. "Sometimes her ability would be helpful to us, to prepare us for her spontaneity. Edward may be the one you want to speak with concerning Alice."

"He can hear her coming," his wife replied. "Most of the time, if he's lucky." She rose from her seat, approaching me. "My name is Esme, dear. Very nice to meet you."

I was expecting a handshake of some sort, but she brought me into a hug immediately. The sensation of being embraced by a vampire was similar to the feeling I had when I thanked Carlisle for helping Jacob—cold, hard. Regardless, it was a welcoming gesture, and totally unnecessary. But the fact that Esme was so warmly inviting me into her home was comforting.

I returned the embrace lightly. "You too. I'm—"

"Sarah, yes I know." She smiled politely. "Talk of you comes up quite often in this house."

I sighed softly. "So I've heard."

"Are you sticking around?" Edward asked. "That is, if Alice isn't already keeping you hostage."

"I should be heading back. But…thanks for letting me hang out for a little while. It actually helped."

Bella smiled. "Good."

"Helped with what?"

I looked to the blonde, and I found it easier to gaze at her when she wasn't staring back. Esme tsked in disappointment. "Rosalie, have some manners. Sarah's business isn't any of ours."

"Then why is she being brought up all the time?"

I was curious to know the same thing, but her tone caught me off guard. She almost seemed…annoyed?

"Rose," Edward warned softly.

"What? It's just a question. One human in the house is enough, and now we have two? Not to mention one that smells like a mutt."

"Hey!" I cried without thought. It was natural to take offense to it; Jacob was anything but a mutt. He was amazing, and always would be, no matter what rash decisions he made. He was my monster, and I would defend him when the time came, even against a vampire. Especially a gorgeous one that could snap me like a toothpick in three seconds. Probably less.

Esme placed a hand on my arm to hold me in place, not that I was going to attack Rosalie anyway. As if I could actually hurt her; it would be like tackling a statue. I'd certainly break some bones in the process. Carlisle had a hand on her shoulder, and it looked like he was squeezing it to emphasize his point.

"Rosalie, enough."

"You do know what could come of this, don't you? If the Volturi finds out about this, will you turn her too?"

My eyes darted around the family, wide in horror. "…_Turn_ me?" I repeated.

"It's nothing, dear," Esme told me softly.

I glanced at Bella for an answer anyway, and she immediately looked to Edward. What was I missing? "Edward?"

"Rosalie, for goodness sake, _shut up_!" he hissed. She had been muttering something to Carlisle, but upon hearing Edward, I thought I heard her growl lowly. Did I upset her that much? What of me knowing they were vampires had to do with anything?

"What's going on?" Alice and Jasper glided down the stairs quickly, stopping next to me and Esme.

"Apparently I pissed someone off," I muttered.

Alice looked to the doctor, who was speaking lowly to Rosalie. "Carlisle?"

He rose from his seat after a small moment, but not without a look of disapproval in Rosalie's direction. He approached me and let out a heavy breath. "We won't discuss such things before the wedding. Edward and Bella's day is not to be spoiled." His eyes darted to his family members at this, but then he looked to me. "We'll inform you after the wedding, if you're still interested. As of right now, it's not worth worrying about. That I can promise you."

He placed a cold hand on my shoulder, and I knew it was meant to comfort me. It did, but only slightly. Were they actually talking about _turning_ me just a second ago?

"Esme, walk her out please."

"Yes, of course." Esme placed a hand on my back and gently ushered me away from the others, with a few of them—including Bella—looking more than uncomfortable. Once Esme had me at the door, she apologized. "I don't know what's gotten into Rosalie, but I promise that nothing will happen to you. Disregard Rosalie's unkind words for a while."

"I'll try my best, I guess."

She smiled softly. "Be careful on your way home, sweetheart."

Once she shut the door, I darted for my car in the downpour. Safe to say, I was once again drenched as soon as I got in. But that was the least of my worries. The Cullens were keeping secrets, and while that was probably normal for them at this point, it was unnerving for me. Who the hell were the Volturi, and what did they have to do with changing me?

As if I would actually become a vampire! Never, ever.

The thought of it made me furious, and I drove through the rain faster than I probably should have. I needed to see my friends, and the only people who could calm me down so quickly were the boys. Emily always needed help around the house anyway, so hopefully I could busy myself with that. Maybe the anger would provide a bit more elbow grease.

But behind my fury was fear. How could I not be shaken of even the talk about becoming a vampire? It was terrifying, and disgusting. Jacob would be enraged upon hearing about it, which I hoped the pack could keep to themselves for a little while.

By the time I reached Sam and Emily's, my sight was blurred with tears. I climbed out of my car and walked briskly toward the porch. "Sam!" I cried.

Even I caught the dread in my voice.

He was outside in seconds, along with a few of the others. I instantly wanted to rush into Embry or Quil's arms upon spotting them.

"Are you crying?" Embry called, unable to really tell in the rain. They stood just off the porch, meeting me halfway.

"The more important question is _why_," Paul grumbled.

I felt my lip quivering and knew that what they said was true. I sucked in a breath at the threat my existence now clearly posed, at least for the Cullens. "Rosalie…"

"Who?"

My eyes darted to Sam. "The blonde one, the blonde Cullen," I clarified. "She said they would have to turn me."

"What?!"

I jumped slightly at the outcry, which wasn't just by Sam; practically every pack member said it, give or take the few who were cursing under their breath. "I know the Cullens are vampires. If the Volturi finds out, they'll have to turn me."

Looks were exchanged, and Quil cursed. "The Volturi… Damn vamps."

"_More_ vampires?" I squeaked.

"Let's get inside," Sam instructed, nodding to the others.

Embry approached me and wrapped his arm around my shoulders, escorting me into the house. Once we were in the living room, I made sure to place myself between Embry and Quil. Their warmth not only helped with the cold I was sure to get—which was a common result of rainstorms—but they were like the brothers I never had; they made me feel safe.

"Tell us exactly what happened," Sam ordered. It was interesting to hear him demand something of me, since I had never been on the receiving end before, but I did as he said.

"I went over to the Cullens' looking for Bella," I began. The looks I got instantly made me shrink back into my seat. "I just wanted some coping methods, that's all. Alice ended up asking me to help her with the wedding a little, and when I was about to leave, Rosalie got pissed. She let everyone know that I could put their family at risk. They would suffer the consequences if the Volturi found out."

"And so would you," Sam assumed. I nodded. "Like hell we'll let that happen. If they harm you, we'll make sure they suffer."

"But do they really have to change me? There has to be some other way."

"From what we know of the Volturi, they aren't a force to be reckoned with," he said. "When we helped stop Victoria, we had to leave before the Volturi arrived. The Cullens' interaction with us was punishable alone."

Well, it looked like things got more complicated.

"So, what? If the Volturi find out Sarah knows about the Cullens, she either turns or she dies?" Embry asked, frowning. "What a load of bull. Keeping the secret should be good enough."

"The only reason Bella is still alive is because they count on the Cullens changing her," Quil reminded everyone. "Once that's done, she's in the clear. Sarah will suffer the same fate unless we do something!"

"We can't do anything until the threat is clear!" Sam bellowed. "Remember that, all of you. Do _not_ be reckless with this information, do you understand?"

There were numerous obedient nods around the room, while I sat frozen in place. Sam looked over then, his eyes gentler with me.

"Was there anything else they told you?"

"Carlisle kept telling me not to worry about it right now," I said. "They won't talk about it with me until the wedding's over."

Sam nodded. "We'll need you to go back. Everyone needs as much information about this as possible."

"Okay."

"Nobody speaks a word of this to anyone," Sam ordered. "And you know who I'm talking about."

My eyebrows furrowed at the last bit, and that was when Sam made eye contact with me. The question was obviously written in my eyes, because he hesitated. He turned, however, and left the room. It was silent, and I was growing hot, probably from the heated discussion and the two next to me. I kept my place, since there was nowhere else to go. I needed to be surrounded by people who kept me safe, protected, just as Jacob would have done if he was here.

That was just it, though. Sam was referring to Jacob just a minute ago. When he said "speaks," he really meant "thinks." Nobody could think about the Volturi or changing me, because if Jacob was nearby when that happened—which was a big if at this point—then he would be irate.

For once, I would be keeping secrets from him.

* * *

_A/N: Things are getting interesting! Leave a review and tell me what you think! Thanks, and take care!_


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